I wanted to use it as a tool to hold myself accountable to the changes I wanted to make in my life. Changes I still want to make, with added ones along the way.
Probably my highest weight |
Right before I got pregnant with the 2nd baby I miscarried |
Somewhere along the line, I started reading other blogs and I lost my own vision for this blog. Of course I should be sharing pictures of my children and documenting their lives, or so I thought. So, instead of using this space to challenge myself to change for the better, I started using it as a place to scrapbook Laney's activities. And then I kind of just stopped.
I want to capture memories of my children growing up, but lately, I have been plagued with questions about whether or not I want that information online. I have started the process of creating photo books to document their lives and I would like to claim this space for me. That is not to say that I will never share about them or put any photos up, but I would like to keep their stories mainly to themselves as I can't take back anything I put out there about them.
Also, I need this space for me. Everything about my life is so heavily entrenched in my children, even my own identity. And, I'm going crazy. Not because of them, but because I am not taking care of myself properly. I love my kids. Therefore, I need to be the best person I can be so that I can be the best mother to them.
So rather than publish another list showing all my crazy goals, I've decided to start slow.
I want to start by documenting my weight loss, so I plan to focus on that goal for awhile.
Here I go again.
P.S. I do plan do give an update soon on my anxiety and panic attacks.
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