Monday Randoms

-Mike and I got into a fight yesterday over something stupid. I was totally ashamed of myself afterwards. I have always tried to fight fair and I've always been proud of the fact that I don't ever use low blows. Yesterday I failed. I insulted Mike as a father to Laney when it was totally unrelated to the argument at hand. I knew it was the easiest way to hurt him. Mike and I forgave each other last night, but both of us still feel bad about the way we treated each other. Why was it so easy for us to argue like that? It was so untypical of us. It was all selfishness. We were both angry with each other from the start of the day and Mike is usually the first one to apologize. He didn't. I didn't either. I felt God really convicting me in the afternoon and telling me to apologize. My response was to ask Mike if he was going to apologize. That is what started the fight. I'm thankful for clean slates and forgiveness. I don't think a marriage would get very far without it. It's all good now.

I love my husband. And for the record, he is an amazing father.

-Laney is dropping weight percentiles. The doctor told me to try and get her eating more food and drinking less milk. It is not easy now as Laney has picked up on a bit of signing and constantly is asking me for milk. It is so cute I can't say no. She also still has a bad cough and we are monitoring it in the next little while. Apparently her lungs were clear. The cough really gets bad at nighttime. She is still her happy little self though.

-I've really been thinking lately about giving. I can't fathom the thought that 30,000 children die every day from starvation or preventable diseases. I am not doing enough. I have way too much. I am sickened at the thought that I need to lose weight because I eat too much and there are children out there who do not have enough food to survive. Mike and I have been having a lot of conversations lately about increasing our giving. As we make more money we want to increase our standard of giving, not our standard of living.

 -Wow. I didn't intend for this to be such a heavy "random Monday" but I guess I need to unload a little bit.

-How's this for random. One day last week our city was the second coldest place on Earth. Here I was feeling all guilty for thinking it was too cold to bundle Laney up and take her outside. Then I saw the news. The only place colder on that day was Antarctica. We were colder than Siberia. Colder than the northern territories in Canada. I will stand by my decision to not take Laney outside in -33 C/-27 F weather. Just so you know, it is much warmer this week.

I snapped this from my window. I did go outside to shovel the walks while Laney was napping, but that was about the only time I stepped out all week.

Thanks for letting me get that out.

(in)frequently (un)asked questions

OK, so I don't actually have questions asked of me very frequently. Regardless, I thought it would be fun to do a little interview with myself here. It might help you understand my blog a little better and it might not. Here we go anyways.


How many kids do you want? When will you have your next one?

Mike wants three and I want four. The thought of being done having kids makes me a little sad. Having my first made me realize how quickly time really goes. Laney was by no means easy in the first six months, and I haven't even wanted to think about the next one until recently. I am not ready yet though. I want to be in a lot better shape before I get pregnant again. I always wanted my kids to be around two years apart, so I am trying to get fit.


What does your husband do for a living?


He is a power lineman apprentice. He climbs utility poles and works on high voltage lines. It doesn't really mix well with a worrying wife. I work hard at trusting God with my husband. For the record, I didn't know what I was getting myself into when we got married. He was a social worker/youth counsellor back then.

True story, when he started pursuing the lineman field I asked him if he would consider a desk job. He responded by asking me if I knew him at all. 


What is your biggest fault?

I really have a lot of them. I don't know if this is my biggest fault, but it is the one that comes to mind right now. I am a terrible procrastinator. I put things off, especially if they are unpleasant. Unfortunately, this often means that I have constant/reoccurring thoughts in the back of my mind about what I should be doing. I am working on just doing what needs to be done because it probably requires a lot less stress and energy to just get it done with in the first place.

What sport do you think you are the best at?

I love sports (playing, not watching). I am not an amazing athlete, but would probably say I am best at soccer. In my childhood I participated in figure skating, gymnastics, ballet, jazz, diving, karate, skiing, swimming, and curling as well as many other unorganized sports.

Do you play an instrument?

I play the piano and the oboe (note: I didn't say well). I haven't played either in a long time.

What is something your readers don't know about you?


I don't think that I am capable of having a boy. A doctor once told my Mum that some women have a hard time carrying boys. My Nana had three girls and two miscarriages, my Mum had four girls and three miscarriages, and so far I have had one girl and one miscarriage. Two of my three sisters have one girl each and no miscarriages. My Mum has always thought that her three miscarriages were boys. I haven't really looked into this to see if there might be some truth to it, but I am convinced that I will only have girls. Weird, huh? It also makes me terrified that I will have more miscarriages.

Are you a glass half-full or half-empty kind of person?

I desperately want to see the glass as half-full, but I think my natural tendency is to be more pessimistic (let's make that sound better and say realistic). I have mentioned before that I struggle with worry. This often causes me to see the worst case scenario or to be afraid of what could go wrong. This is something I am working on. Maybe worry is my biggest character flaw.

What are your favourite blogs to read?

I like reading a variety of blogs. Here are a couple of my must-reads.


Enjoying the Small Things: I'm guessing that there is a good chance you already know about Kelle's blog. I find her inspiring in that she makes me appreciate the everyday more. Some of my favourite posts from her blog include her Isles of Capri posts, but they make me wish for a warmer climate!

The Mommyhood Memos: Adriel writes such great posts. They are well-thought out and I look forward to reading them. She has tons of great informational posts for mums. Check out her post on choosing a childcare centre or this one about how all mums are hardworking mums.


Thanks for humouring me with this post. To be honest, I thought of the title first and couldn't resist the rest.

I would love to know more about you guys though. Could you do me a favour and either answer one of the above questions or tell me something else about you? What blogs are you reading these days?

A few randoms

-Laney has croup. Poor little one. I've tried taking her outside to breathe cold air and we have been doing a lot of snuggling. She is now on breathing medications. She doesn't exactly enjoy having the mask held over her face. Have any of you guys dealt with croup before? What helped?

-Winter arrived. Last night we had a winter storm warning. It's days like this when I'm glad I don't have to leave the house if I don't want to. The temperature dropped significantly and we now have a lovely white blanket covering everything outside. During times like these I always wish I had a fireplace to snuggle up in front of. Hence, the Wooden Wick candles I bought. They crackle a bit and smell great.

-I got my Christmas decorations up. The tree looks a little funny as I've had to move all the ornaments out of Laney's reach. That's alright though. I'd rather have my Laney and a funny looking tree, than a department store tree and no Laney.

-I got the job! I start in January which is exactly what I was hoping for. Now I get to enjoy a couple more months with my little one before starting work. It is five shifts every fourteen days. I wouldn't mind a little less, but I am so thankful that I do not have to work full-time. Now I'm just nervous because it seems like I have forgotten everything and it has been awhile since I have had patients depending on me. I am so thankful that my old job wouldn't extend my maternity leave giving me the impetus to quit. I probably wouldn't have quit even though I wanted to.

-With a sick baby, my house is a disaster zone. Seriously. I need to do a good clean, but I am lacking energy after spending most of my time tending to Laney.

-I've also now missed two days of the 30 day shred. I am making myself do it tonight after Laney is sleeping for the night.

Worry, fear, and joy

Mothers, does the worry ever end? Is there ever a point in your child's life when you can sit back and say, "pfew, now I can relax."

I'm guessing not.

After losing my first baby to miscarriage, I spent a lot of time during my second pregnancy willing the first trimester away. And, while I did feel some relief at twelve weeks, other worries soon crept in. Then, I couldn't wait until she was born because then she would be out here safely. I quickly found out that it is even harder having them on the outside. Out here, they can be separated from you. There are multitudes of things that can happen to children. SIDS was next on my worry list. And so on and so on. I have to end this cycle. I have been doing a lot better lately and I think that some of my issues (OK, maybe all) are due to me not fully trusting God and I need to. We can never make sure our babies are completely safe. Sure, we do what we can and avoid risks, but there are no guarantees.

Even though there are so many terrible things that can happen, we are not meant to live in fear. I heard this quote quite some time ago and I want to share it with you because it is true. If anyone knows what they are talking about in this department it would be Corrie Ten Boom.

Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength. -- Corrie Ten Boom

I would also add that it empties today of its joy. It is hard to be joyful when you live in worry and fear. My big step lately has been shutting off Laney's Angelcare monitor. I know that God will watch over her and I have to trust Him and not my monitor.

We're not all worry though. Like how I just changed the topic there? I'm not great at it, I know. Anyways, we have been playing outside as often as we can. Winter is just around the corner. With that can mean a fair amount of time couped up indoors and so we must make the most of autumn. And, getting outside often means a random ensemble of non-matching clothes. I won't try and blame Laney's outfit on Mike.

Do you live in a warmer climate? If so, do you sometimes wish for a proper winter. Those of you who have winter like we do, how are you preparing for it?

Interview outfit and my toasty marshmallow

It's been awhile since I've been so nervous. Well, maybe I was nervous before having Laney and that wasn't all that long ago. This morning my stomach was all aflutter, my palms sweaty and cold, and I felt shaky. I'm not really sure how the interview went. I was quite nervous, but think I managed to do OK. I know I could have answered some of the questions a whole lot better though. Anyways, now that it's out of the way, I'm going to try and put it out of my mind until I hear from them.

I have to share my interview outfit with you. Please feel free to tell me what you think, good or bad. A main reason for starting this blog was to improve myself, including my fashion sense. Personally, I love the colour of the satin shirt. I need to make a better effort at dressing myself up more often. Laney hardly recognized me when I got her up from her nap. She kept smiling at me and kissing me. I think she liked it.

Please excuse the "bobblehead" shot. I had to take it myself.

I found a used snowsuit for Laney and wanted to try it on her in case I needed to return it. No worries. It was huge. Once the snowpants went on Mike and I burst out laughing at the sight. Laney looked like a marshmallow baby and I was tearing up I was laughing so hard.

Once she started walking in her snowsuit I just about died. I feel bad for all of you who live in warm climates and don't get to experience snowsuits. Really, I do. It's not very often that I feel any sympathy for you folks, but I think you are missing out when it comes to snow sports. Don't think I feel all that bad for you though, I do spend a fair amount of time dreaming of living in a warmer climate. You just haven't lived if you haven't seen a baby in a snowsuit that adds about three times to her bulk. I can't wait to throw her onto a big old snowbank.

Oh, and P.S. I've lost 5 pounds since starting the 30 Day Shred on November 1. Yay! I've now completed seven workouts, only missing two. I am happy with the results so far.

Are you sick? and the winner

...because it seems like everyone I know has either been experiencing the flu or a cold. Laney got hit with a pretty bad cold a couple of weeks ago and it is still lingering. There have been several times that either Mike or I has woken up out of a dead sleep and ran into her room because of a major coughing fit. I am hoping it is nearing its end. As for me, I was so excited that I didn't catch it from her for the first time (out of about 8 colds so far). Then, yesterday I got it. The only high note was Mike running me a hot bath and making me some lemon ginger tea with honey. What a keeper!

The cold couldn't have come at a worse time because I have my job interview tomorrow. It has been so long since I have been to one of those. Yikes. I feel nervous and don't know how prepared I am. Is anyone ever totally prepared for one of those?

In totally unrelated, uninteresting news, my computer is on its last legs. I am expecting its demise any day now. RIP Porky (when Windows asked me to name my computer I gave it the first name that popped into my head). Porky is four years old, but there are many things wrong with him/her. It overheats, the battery is totally dead, the power cord is frayed and falls out, Laney broke the "ctrl" key, and now, the spacebar key isn't working properly. I really want a Mac computer and I have the money saved up for it, but I will not buy one until I have a job. Yay responsible me.

And finally, the winner of the CSN giveaway is...

Carrie! Congratulations. Check your email.

Hope you all have a fantastic week

The quitters

I felt it when I woke up this morning. Burning muscles. Everywhere. I was already making excuses in my head as to why I wouldn't work out this morning ("you can ease into it" "wait until you're not as sore; you can work up to everyday" "Laney woke up early, do it later"). I immediately (OK a few minutes later) recognized these voices in my head as "the quitters" and I decided I wasn't going to let them win this time. That is why I dragged myself out of bed and made myself do day 2 of the 30 Day Shred this morning.  I found that once I got warmed up my muscles didn't hurt as bad, although I definitely wasn't able to keep up the pace as well as yesterday. I did finish it though. I will work through the pain. I just hope the soreness isn't compounded tomorrow.

Anyways, I wasn't the only one tired yesterday. Last evening, Mike wanted to clean up the yard a bit. I dressed Laney up and let her run around the yard in the crisp air. After her bath, I was doing our nighttime ritual starting with brushing her hair. Instead of fighting me for the brush as usual, Laney laid her head against me. I called Mike in and found that she had fallen asleep against me, still on her bath towel.

I was so disappointed that I couldn't just lay her down like that (stupid diaper and sleeper). It was one of those moments I want to etch into my memory. Long after she's grown I want to be able to close my eyes and remember every detail. And, I think she caught onto something. Tonight she needed me to rock her to sleep and it has been a very long time since she has allowed me that privilege. I am one blessed mother.

I've been shredded

Today was day one of doing the 30 day shred DVD. Wow. My legs were shaking and I felt sick for an hour or two afterwards. I was so sore I was worried I wasn't going to be able to take very good care of Laney. I don't know how I will feel tomorrow, but I'm going to make myself do it again anyways. I really like that this workout only takes 20 minutes, because let's face it, mums often don't have much more free time than this. Jillian Michaels ensures that you work hard for those 20 minutes. There are no breaks and you are always working two muscle groups.

Mike really wants us both to focus a lot more on being healthier. I really appreciate this because in the past it has always been me trying to initiate changes in our eating habits. Having him on-board will make things much easier (or so I hope). We are going to weigh-in every Sunday evening. I am ready to do this. I don't have any more time to lose.

There's still time to enter the 35$ CSN giveaway.